MISSING YOU by Lady PJ

MISSING YOU

How I wish you would touch me

Like you use to touch me

You know? Like I was special

You see… I miss the way you looked at me

With your eyes all glossy

And your heart so free

Not like the way you see me now

With that look of hate in your eyes

And those repulsive thoughts

That say to me “goodbye”

And I’m lost as to what to do

My words go through you

With every touch you pull away

Are you too far gone?

That you can’t love me?

Am I that awful that you can’t touch me?

Do you not see me, anymore?

I’m standing right here

Feeling your hurt, open to sharing your pain

Holding you down when you can hardly stand

I haven’t changed or ran away

My love grows stronger for you with every day

I’m not the enemy; so don’t release me

Written by Philessa H. Jenkins

Aka Lady PJ

11/29/2013 4:23 PM

Copyright 2013

ALL RIGHTS RESERVED

Every Thing Lady PJ: BEHOLD THERE STANDS GLORY

Here's a poem I wrote a long time ago.  Enjoy and I hope you enjoyed your Thanksgiving with your families.  I'm so very thankful to have such a wonderful family and really great friends.  Much love to you all and be careful on this "Black Friday."

Every Thing Lady PJ: BEHOLD THERE STANDS GLORY: BEHOLD THERE STANDS GLORY Behold there stands glory! On display in a glassed cell The will inside longing Just to place hand to flesh ...

BEHOLD THERE STANDS GLORY

BEHOLD THERE STANDS GLORY

Behold there stands glory!
On display in a glassed cell
The will inside longing
Just to place hand to flesh
A desire filled with a passion
That burns from a heated flame
The magicians' wand rendered useless
No witches black magic hath the
Power to break these shackles that
Bind her to this fortified cage
Yet eyes all glazed and astonished
Stare at her beauty longing to
Taste her bitter fruit or graze
Like cattle at her feet.  The blinding
Deceitful harlot deserving the wrath
That war carries with the wind.  yet
Dare she stands, a teaser of men!





Written by Philessa Hooks
May 19, 2004
Copyright 2005
Georgia
All Rights Reserved

I FOUGHT THE BATTLE

I FOUGHT THE BATTLE

Anger flows through me like a stream

Rushing water constantly refreshing my mind

I can’t breathe. I’m caught up by the vastly

Flowing currents beneath me

As I’m sinking further and further,

I think. I can’t save myself.

Deeper and deeper into the crystal blue I fall,

I can barely see the sun and the darkness engulfs me,

But I’m wrapped in its comforting arms

Like a mother holding her baby close to her

Always careful and always mindful of its fragile state

The sunray’s are all but gone

But I’m drifting away into the deepest

And darkest place, where hands reach out to me

But none can save me

I know now I must fall

I must slowly drift away

Into the darkness and into the depths of my soul

Where I am lost

I’m caught in the undercurrents

As the water rushes over my body

The harder I fight the more the darkness

Consumes my spirit, robing me of my joy

While I’m falling further away from safe shores there’s calm

A tranquility that takes hold of me

I think to myself: I lost the battle, l waged

I lost the war, I fought

I lost self, then died

Inside, I died!

Written by Philessa Jenkins

Aka Lady PJ

August 30, 2005

ALL RIGHTS RESERVED

Copyright 2005

THE WATERFALL

THE WATERFALL

A waterfall built of anger
Rage contained on a page
Note after note of bitterness
Spilling out like blood
Running down the drain

Blinded by the darkness of the night
Figting within, hoping to get out
Floating above, hovering over the grave
Lost in sensual anguish drizzling
Like raindrops falling; then fades

Mentally overcome by nothingness
Numb to the core of existence
What is this day when nights
Do fall and slowly drift away?
What is this life when time doth pass
And nothing is uttered or said?

No kind words from these lips
No goodness from this heart
No shame left to feel
No remorse, and No regrets
Just day-be-gets day,
be-gets-day
Filled with anger drenched in rage
Alas the taste still bitter page after
Page, after page



written by Philessa Hooks
August 30, 2005
Copyright 2005

FREEDOM

FREEDOM

He looked at me through demon eyes
My soul did shake and quiver
My heart had sunk a thousand times
Yet still my feet delivered

A war had raged within me
That compelled me first to act
In an instance my life had changed
And the world turned cold and black

Once I thought him a gentle man
All so loving and kind
But in every touch and every kiss
Deceit came pouring down

With his passing, my freedom came
And my journey then began
I finally held my head up high
I smiled, I laughed, and grinned

Now I stand at judgment
With these tears I gently cry
I cannot ask for forgiveness
For saying I'm sorry would be a lie




All Rights Reserved
Copyright 2005
writting by Philessa Hooks

Love Don't Love Me Softly

LOVE DON’T LOVE ME SOFTLY

You take me high then bring me low

Up in the clouds one day, next day to the floor

Love don’t love me softly

No, love don't love me true

Love don’t love me -love me

Not the way that I….. Love you

I’m sinking now; hope can’t be found

Church bells keep ringing, tears are falling down

I pull my knees, straight to my heart

Holding them tight cause I’m falling apart

Here shaking like crazy; frustrated and

Thinking of the days when it was your arms I felt

This hurt is just aching and I’m feeling like death

Can someone please save me, I need to feel myself

My spiritual energy drained and I have nothing left
Cause love don't love me softly, no love don't love me true
Love don't love me, love me, not the way that I love you

Copyright April 27, 2013

ALL RIGHTS RESERVED

written by Philessa Jenkins

I'm Waiting For You

Do you know that I'm waiting? I'm waiting for you
Where the sun shines bright and the sky is blue
I search for a sign or a light that will lead me to you
Instead I find this emptiness, see it fits me best
Now I'm as lost as I can be, like a ship lost at sea
Just waiting for that day when I'll hear you say
“That you love me too”

I've tried in many ways to show you how I feel
But you haven't a clue
How I wish you knew
That my heart is slowly bleeding
Because I'm missing you

Right now when I'm dreaming
My dreams are all of you
I can't explain this feeling
Cause now it's just a pain
A heart that keeps on aching
Teardrops that fall like rain

I left a candle in the window
It's there to light your way
A sign that says, "You are welcome"
And I hope that you will stay

My heart cries out to you
My soul needs you now
Please come to me my love
I’m waiting at the door
Waiting for you

written by Philessa Jenkins
All Rights Reserved
Copyright 2013
5/15/2013

BLACK RAVEN

BLACK RAVEN Didn’t know I was sleep walking Eyes wide open as I’m falling Living my life in cubicles Shooting darts at the parts I know Maybe freedom is a myth to me Trying to hang strong to the Person I hoped to be Adrift in this mist Wearing sheep’s clothing Longing to be this beast That clings to me I flow wide open Wondering where the lies hide Trying to fix those parts that died I hold myself inside Sniffing out that chain Then riding high On that dark cloud A Phantom I fly under the radar Refusing to be that shining star I change stations Today I fade away I am that black raven Written by Philessa H. Jenkins Aka Lady PJ 11/17/13 @10:28 pm Copyright 2013 All Rights Reserved

When the Darkness Sets

When the Darkness Sets

By Philessa Hooks Jenkins

11/12/2013 11:07pm

The door knob turns slowly

As I’m woken from a deep sleep

I can hear the footsteps
On the other side of the door

But I’m paralyzed, I can’t move

My heart beats loudly

I can’t catch the air

I tell myself that I’m all alone

Pulling the cover over my head

Then I just close my eyes
As if it would save me some how

Wishing this crazy feeling would pass

I can hear the door as it creeks open

I find myself on the floor shaking

As the panic sets in I begin to feel this calm

It’s as if the world went silent

Right there in that moment

I woke to the darkness; engulfed by this fear

Then forced to listen but nothing...
no more footsteps

I build up the courage inside me
to peek over the bed

The room is silent and filled with darkness

But I manage to see that the bedroom door is closed

Was I dreaming?

I crawl along the bed in the direction of the light switch

Still afraid… until the light came on

And I realized that I was still alone